Vaughan's remains my mainstay. Last night it was brought into stark relief how quickly one can lose the keys to the kingdom. Also, how childishly I am invested in Vaughan's. I know that nothing is perfect or lasts forever, but I know that were Vaughan's to fail me, the disillusionment would be crippling. They did "Cruisin'" last night. I didn't realise I was crying till later.

Someone's car is blasting the closing chords of Dave Matthews "The Stone."

The church near my house which sounds bells has taken to playing my school hymn from Hill House. "All creatures of our God and King, Lift up your voice and with us sing, Alleluia, Alleluia." I hear choruses of English schoolchildren, sitting cross-legged and screwing up the harmony.

In New Orleans, when you drive, there are always compromises to be struck and deals to be brokered between the potholes in the road before you and the To-Go cups in your cupholders and in the hands of your passengers.

You should read the article in today's NYTimes about small businesses in New Orleans. Then you should make plans to come and visit. There are used bookstores and art and food and bric-a-brac and antiques and it will hurt immeasurably when they are gone.

I fear that if I leave here, I will miss it so much that I won't give where I am a fair chance. All the more reason to go somewhere incredible that will enchant me against my will. Because I also know that once I've left, I can't come back.